It’s been intense. Ever since my Grandfather’s funeral there’s been family stuff rolling fast and furious and there’s no end in sight. I’m overwhelmed and amazed by the blessing that is my brother and amazed at his blessing that is his wife. Blessing’s the right term, religious or not, we can be blessed by chance and mathematics and the convergence of events and people. I’ve got no problem with that version of the universe, but to question the worth of our gifts and providence simply because we don’t believe they were brought to us by some diety is like spitting in the face of our parents.
Heather and I are wrapping up what’s essentially been a 2 and a half month tour. From New England to Missouri there’s been some time in Maryland, but when that time is measured better in hours than it is in days, it doesn’t count as being “home”. Rowan flew home from Charlotte on Thursday and we’re on our way to Wilmington, NC for two last shows, then Raleigh and then finally back to Maryland for the winter.
Today I heard my first Christmas song of the season – “Walking in a Winter Wonderland” flowed beautifully into Bing Crosby crooning “White Christmas” and it was exactly what I needed. Though the southern sun is strong and we’re constantly on the fence balanced between rolling with the windows down or the AC up, the cotton blooms have been harvested and their fluffy white remainders are scattered all over the fields mimicking the beauty of the coming season.
Christmas always fills me with nostalgia and with nostalgia comes hope – because for me nostalgia isn’t just the memory of things gone past, but of things that are cyclical and that will come around again. I’m sure there’s another word for that feeling, but it’s that joy of passing Christmas tree farms and thinking about hunting just the right tree with my brother and my father and though, of course, I’ll never go Christmas tree hunting with my Dad again, it’ll be with friends or someone special. I’m hoping to find the time and the money to make it out to Strausburg, ride the train with Santa Claus… all the things that make the year complete.
