October 9th, 2020. Nightmares and Visions.

When I have nightmares I often feel very real pain, or wake up with that lung-squeezing terror that is so very physical, or the feeling of things and people pulling on me, but usually the imagery is straight-forwardly violent. My dreams are often apocalyptic or worthy of a big-budget science fiction flick, but very rarely are the of the supernatural “horror” genre.
Last night sure was different and I think I at least partly blame the stunningly invasive, mind-worm imagery of Lovecraft Country, a show that I will probably STILL be undecided on even as it wraps in a couple of weeks.

In any case I dreamt that we were loading gear from someone’s Living room into their dining room – I guess we might’ve been just helping to move General Stuff of some sort, but I feel like it’s safe to assume we were moving musical gear. I feel like it was speakers, amplifiers, things that didn’t leave your hands free. And in order to move this stuff from point A to point C you had to pass through point B which was the kitchen. Point A was well lit, point C was NOT lit and point B was right in between – and also the angles were such that from one room to the next you were going around a corner and couldn’t see clearly into the next room from where you were.
And so – as we’re getting ready to do this the owner is DEEPLY apologetic but her morbidly obese mother had died the day before yesterday and she died in the kitchen and she apologized but she hasn’t been able to get anyone in to move her yet could we just please work around her?

And so we’re moving amps, shuffling past this just humongous dead one still upright in the kitchen, head lolling and eyes staring. Grey corpse flesh, veiny and we’ve got to move sideways to not knock into her and the first couple of trips are bad enough but then parts of her start getting chopped off. We don’t see or hear it happen but we move through the kitchen and this time the head’s missing. Just a grisly stump. And then and arm is missing. And a leg. And we slowly become aware of bumping against these PARTS in the poorly lit / unlit Living room as we’re setting things down. Something squishing as we set an amp down, or we slip in something loose and sticky. Finally there’s nothing left in the kitchen but puddles and stains and we’re moving in to the Living room and we can’t see and something cold and wet LUMBERS into me as I’m carrying something huge, hands wrapped around a PA speaker something PUSHES –

And I snap awake and get can’t get the images out of my head. And then it’s the terrifying dancing murder children from last night’s Lovecraft Country and I haven’t wanted to sleep with the lights on that bad in a LONG long time… but there was no way I was reaching out in the dark for the lamp…