Landline.

Unpaid bills are mounting
oh Hell that’s so cliche
but the fountain of my youth
seems to be giving all of it’s youth away
today

and I don’t need a shower
today’s a day to be wasted in the basement
with nothing here but me and the Muzak
like i had nothing better to do today

my ear’s begun to ache
how much more can the batteries take
the only use of the landline now
is to pay the bill of the landline now

all the paperwork is mounting
i thought we had entered the digital age
but the rainforests are just so damned giving
we got to keep on throwing their Bounty away

I can’t afford to shower
that’s just money down the drain
with nothing myself and the things I’ve let go
like I’ve got nowhere else to be today

and my ear’s begun to melt
into the plastic of the landline now
the only use of the landline now
is to pay the bill of the landline now

press 1 for my indignation
and 2 for all my time
and 3 for all the indigestion
caused by stressing and redirection
4 will be the quarter’s bill
and 5 if you speak Spanish
and 6 if you’re rich you’ll get through quick
a human on a direct line

somewhere above me sits the architect of all my ills
he pulls the strings and writes the checks
and I haven’t written this line yet
and I must admit I’m coasting
I’m happy to just sit
as long as I’m on hold
I’ve got someone else to blame for all my shit

and so I want to give you
everything that i can
cause once I hit the bottom
someone’s paid to help me stand

so please please answer my important call
in the order that it was received
let me help you help me help me
and tell me how much you need to receive

and my ear’s begun to melt
into the plastic of the landline now
the only use of the landline now
it to tell someone I plan to pay them somehow.