September 17th, 2014.

Ugh. Nightmares and bad news have swirled together to make what SHOULD be an absolutely beautiful sunshiney day in Bloomington, IN into an emotionally fraught morning. Last night I dreamt what should’ve been kind of a fun dream. My dad and I were involved in some sort of heist – there were lots of hinted-at and half-remembered hijinks, maybe a car chase, LOTS of stuff going on – we’d stolen a beautiful old gold-plated 5-string banjo. I was doing a lot of opening of doors and climbing over things, by father casually strolling with me with the banjo slung over one shoulder.

But then things switched dramatically to some sort of cold, tiled space – like a big shower room – I don’t tend to dream in colour, but this place was MORE black and white and grey than usual somehow – and we’d been caught. Some men were standing over us and had us down on our knees and then my dad just collapsed and the visual of his face was just like when he’d died, slack and drawn and pale – the transformation happened so fast, and he just slumped in place. The next moment he was just sprawled ungracefully across the tile, blood coming out of one ear, last breath whistling out, banjo laid across his chest – and these men wouldn’t let me go to him, and I wasn’t struggling too hard because I knew there was nothing I could do.

I woke up crying at around 8am and muzzily wandered a still-sleeping house for a minute or three before returning to bed. I was putting my earplugs back in and fell asleep between putting in one and the next, I have no idea where the second one has fallen. It’s got to be around here somewhere…

When I got up a second time, it was a lot later than I’d intended and I found Heather all messed up over a nightmare as well. Also a two-parter, also with a really awful wakening.

The friend we were going to stay with tonight in Louisville, KY has had family tragedy strike and won’t be able to take us in, we’re re-planning – and remembering that at least our tragedies are dreams or in the past and my heart goes out to my friend because his is current and terrible. (Paul, you and yours are in our hearts).Last night we played at the Columbus Bar in Columbus, IN – a long-time favourite venue in the area – it’s crazy to see how the local area has sprung up. It’s no longer the only bar in town and much to our chagrin, many of our favourite people have moved on – but not in that normal way where you’re simply no longer on one side of the bar, having moved on to like… real estate or engineering or slum lord or race car driver… but in the gone-over-to-the-other-side way, having moved on to other bars and restaurants in the area. There was an interesting edge to that conversation, like a relationship in which you wish your ex the best, but they’ve left you for something new and shiny that you’re SURE has no REAL substance…

But I’m not here, I don’t really understand what’s underneath it all. Many of our long-time friends (we’ve traced back visits to the area to about 2007, around this time of year) talked about the nostalgia of being able to come see us here again – and though we’re playing far above people’s heads, there’s an intimacy here that we don’t have with a lot of other towns. I wonder if that would’ve formed if our first couple of shows hadn’t been on the first floor.

Okay, I’m just sort of meandering. I made breakfast for everyone this… afternoon… purple broccoli and potatoes and tomatoes and eggs. Coffee’s on the horizon and we’re going to have a planning session today. Though the upset of our crash plans in the Louisville tonight equal a) a very long drive after the show tonight and b) no proper visit to Louisville, KY – it DOES mean that we’ve got most of the day in Bloomington tomorrow sitting still, which will probably be advantageous. I’m doing my first load of road laundry today and we’ve got some lesson planning yet to do for Kansas, it’s probably not a bad thing to have some more-dedicated “office” time.