So, Kristen’s over her symptoms but she’s still testing positive. I’ve never had symptoms and never tested positive. She’s wearing a mask around the house and the house is COLD cause there have been fans going and windows cracked since she test positive and I guess since I’m still doing okay we’re doing SOMETHING right, but it’s exhausting, and it’s cold, and it’s lonely.
In the meantime, do I play gigs, do I play with friends? I know what the rules are. I know what the recommendations are. Those rules and recommendations are made by people and institutions that have a lowest-common-denominator approach to public health and interests that don’t full align with my own.
I played my first solo Live from the Lair last week. This week we’re firmly planning to play together, but Kristen’s going to be in a separate room and Sharif and Joey’ll be in with me.
I don’t really know what the right answer is, but I’ve long held to the idea that I have different roles in the world…. As a performer, I know my bandmates have all been through the wringer, and I know each of their comfort levels. I know they’ve all been vaccinated and we still keep track of who’s comfortable with what exposure levels, who is masking where, etc.
This is ALSO exhausting.
As a performer, I know going out and playing a show – like we’ll (probably) be doing on Saturday – well, audiences have made their choices about going out to various environments with LOTS of unknowns. I’m testing negative. I’m probably NOT the problem here but I’ll probably avoid hugging people.
But as an open mic host, I think it’s probably smarter for me to generally play it ubersafe, and that’s why Heather’s running my open mic tonight and, though it PAINS me – and like – I mean I feel a visceral, emotive pain at having been so isolated recently – I think that there’s a difference between getting up and performing for an audience vs getting up to a mic, sharing that mic, handing people cables, getting up close and adjusting their mics, plus I’m the shepherd and / or goatherd in that setting… PLUS the Takoma Spark is a small room. That ONLY works if we’re being caring with one another and being extra cautious with vectors.
Dave still wanted me to come. I bet it’d be fine. I felt like it’s the wrong message.
And so I’m staying home listening to Daryl Shawn play guitar feeling like I can’t go out and play… feeling cold, lonely and exhausted.
Of course, it’s KRISTEN that has COVID. Save your sympathy for HER – but again, she’s over her symptoms and she’s the one who LIKES staying home.
I am cold. And lonely. And exhausted.
Daryl Shawn’s a good companion.
And Heather’s a great host.